Ladies, I want to start by saying YOU ARE NEVER ALONE.
This week has been oddly a very lonely week for myself. I’ve really struggled with not having people to do things with. I see my friends around me celebrating and having fun. I literally came home and cried because we don’t have many friends that come or we do things with. I understand that right now is a time in our life where we are all busy raising our families. I do truly believe God has placed me where I am but I’ll just say “God are you teaching me to make more friends? or is this where I am to be? Raising my kids and focusing on teaching them about You?”
I’ve always talked about how I would rather have quality over quantity with friends and the friends I do have I consider my family. I hope this doesn’t make me sound greedy or rude. But I want more friends.
My husband and I don’t have a lot of money so we struggle with going out with friends or going on vacations with friends. My heart breaks and a lot of times I’m embarrassed or ashamed because we can’t afford to go out to eat when invited or out for drinks.
This is where my husband and I struggle is making friends. My husband is very much content with sitting at home watching TV, being alone. That’s who Craig is, there is nothing wrong with this. I’m an extrovert and become depressed if I don’t have enough adult interaction. And this past week has been hard. It’s been work and kids all week.
I see my friends all over Facebook going out with friends and having fun all summer. I don’t get invited to go places with friends. But this is ALL MY FAULT. I sit at home and moan and whine about my friends having fun and making memories but I don’t go when I am invited because “my kids were naughty, or I have too much work to do, or just plain I didn’t or don’t want to do.” So being alone is all my fault.
I love people but I also struggle with people. This sounds so bad but I’m picky with who my kids and I hang out with. I have this belief with you are who you hang out with. I always struggled growing up with hanging in the wrong crowd and now that I’m older I want to be surrounded by the good people. I know by now I’ve dug my whole and you all think i’m a bad person. But just hear me out.
As a female, making friends is the hardest thing ever. The stigma of being a good mom, who does more with there kids, who has nice clothes, which church do you go to. And this is where I fight myself. I judge myself so badly against other women that I ruin myself. So like I said before when I see my friends going to get Mani and pedis together but I can’t afford it, I become overly jealous because they can afford it and have money to do things like that. This is that point I think we forget we as mothers need to pray.
Praying for something like friends or help with coveting is something we forget we should do. Or even when we feel alone.
Lord, I have been trying to do this friendship thing on the surface for far too long. You alone know my heart and my longing for relationship, but You alone also know the walls I have built between myself and others. So, Lord, today I come before you asking for meaningful friendships. Ones that endure. I pray for friendships transformed by Your presence. Ones that stir each other to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another. (Heb 10: 24-25). Ones where we warn each other of sin (1 Thes 5: 14), yet mourn and rejoice with each other, as well (Rom 12:15). Friendships that live out loving well by caring each other’s burdens (Gal 6:2) and caring for each other’s practical needs (Rom 12:13, Heb 13:16). Lord I ask you for humbleness in these friendships so that together we can confess our sins and pray for one another, that we may be healed. That together we are righteous and our prayers have great power (James 5: 16). Lord, so that I may be sharpened for you, I ask for friendships that sharpen me just as iron sharpens iron (Prov 27: 17). In this moment, I give You my heart and the walls I have built around it. I surrender my fears, my insecurities, and my control issues. Let me be the friend of Your design and bring to me those friends who are of that same design. In Your precious and holy name I pray. Amen
Untitleddocument (this is the printable prayer)
Print this prayer put it beside you’re bed, in your bathroom, Pray it. Me and You lets step out of the stigma of moms and women and make friends. Lets let our kids see that making friends is easy and having friends is important. Being there for them in all times and sticking by each other. Telling each other our hurts and being real. Stop the stigma of perfect mommying and just remember we all raise our kids differently and that’s okay but also respecting the way we all raise our kids differently. (If that made sense)
Yes I want more friends but I also want friends that God gives me, so trust Him and trust you’re feelings. Pray. Talk. Listen.
You will have those days where you feel so alone so call on Him to fill you up.
Enjoy your friends, and family. Life is short. Laugh and Love.